It’s official – you’ve become the most boring person in the world. All you do is work, clean your house, cook and spend time with your child.
If you’re like most parents, you love your child more than anyone else in the world. But sometimes, you need some adult time that doesn’t involve scrubbing the shower or mind-numbingly boring conversations in the lunch room at work. Sometimes you want to catch a glimpse of the person you used to be before you had kids – the person who was fearless, adventurous and spontaneous. If you recognize yourself in more than one of these 6 categories, you should schedule a night out as soon as possible.
You can’t remember what fancy drinks taste like
You know it has been too long since your last night out on the town if your idea of a fancy drink is snitching one of your child’s juice boxes when she isn’t looking. Then there’s the days you’re feeling really naughty when you add chocolate to your 1 percent milk.
If this sounds like you, you are long overdue for an adult cocktail with a little umbrella in it. If you don’t drink alcohol, go get yourself a fancy smoothie.
The supermarket is a wild adventure
When a trip to the supermarket feels like the highlight of your week, you need some serious help. If you find yourself getting dolled up just to go shop for your groceries for the week, you need a little more adventure in your life. If this is you, you need to hire a babysitter and call some friends. Go do something, anything, that doesn’t involve comparing prices on soups and teas.
What would you wear?
If you don’t have an outfit to wear for an adult gathering, you know it has been too long since you’ve had any “you” time. You probably have your work clothes, and then a wide assortment of comfort clothes like sweatshirts, yoga pants and t-shirts. For 99.9 percent of your life, those clothes would be appropriate. But you should make it a priority to buy at least one outfit that isn’t designated for office use or home chores.
Your favorite hobbies are a thing of the past
Maybe back in the day you were a regular movie-goer or you used to buy tickets to see your favorite bands in concert. If your last ticket stub is from 10 years ago, maybe it’s time to shake things up and reinvent yourself. What’s the worst thing that could happen if you left your child with some responsible adults and took the night off to explore your old hobbies?
You don’t need a fork for most of your meals
Your idea of a fine meal these days is an order of French fries and chicken nuggets that you get at a drive-thru restaurant. You don’t need a plate or a table. You scarf down that food straight out of the bag in record time, while hunched over your steering wheel trying to fight your way through traffic.
The next time you get an urge to eat unhealthy food at the speed of light, take a deep breath and tell yourself no. Then head to a restaurant, sit down and have yourself a leisurely, proper meal that you don’t have to cook or clean up after. You will feel like you’ve won the lottery.
You only watch kid shows on your television
If you’ve become too emotionally invested in Peppa Pig and her family, you can name all the characters from SpongeBob SquarePants, and you find yourself watching your child’s favorite programs even after she goes to bed, you need an intervention. You are living vicariously through your television – and the worst part is that it isn’t even age appropriate for you.
If more than one of these 6 categories apply to you, you really need to do a better job of making yourself a priority. It’s great that you’re a wonderful, hands-on parent, but you can’t live only for your child. That’s too much pressure to put on one kid’s shoulders. Besides, what happens someday when your child grows up and leaves home to live her own life. You’ll be seriously screwed because you won’t know who you are anymore. So do both of you a favor and rejoin the adult social world – the sooner the better.